Events!

It's that time of the month again. No, not THAT time. The time where I notice that Robbie and Scott have been blogging about events that involve me, and then I remember that I'm supposed to blog about the events that I do too, and then I post a really long and intimidating list of all the things I've got coming up, none of which is relevant to any of you because you all live in Canada.

Hurrah! I LIKE this time of the month.

17th October, the Book Swap on tour: Guildford festival. 3pm at the Electric Theatre. We've got Anne Berry, whose debut novel The Hungry Ghosts is a dark tale of a haunted girl set in Hong Kong as it approaches reunification with China; and Niven Govinden, whose fantastic coming of age story Graffiti My Soul I accidentally left on holiday and haven't finished, much to my genuine distress, and whose We Are The New Romantics is apparently utterly (and enjoyably) filthy, according to Scott.

21st October, the Book Swap at its ancestral home the Firestation in Windsor: the usual deal, starts at 7.45, £5 or cake to enter, and Warren Fitzgerald and Tim Relf on the sofa. I'm getting my mitts on their books tomorrow, but in the meantime, regular swappers will like to know that Tim is the man who always comes up with the best questions: the cat worming question, the Legoland wasp question, and so on. As he won't be able to ask any questions this week I am putting out the call for particularly strange questions to welcome him to the business end of the auditorium.

22nd October, the 14 x 4 charity dinner, again in Windsor. All the details are here, but in essence: it's called 14 x 4 because there are 14 tables at the dinner, you get a 4 course meal, and for every course of the meal you get to share your table with one of 14 authors - ie you eat with 4 authors in all. There will be speeches between courses, of which I am making one, and the authors who are participating but aren't me are Robbie Hudson, Kate Williams, Warwick Cairnes, Tamsyn Murray, Charlie Williams, Tom Reynolds, Patrick Woodrow, Jess Ruston, Aliya Whiteley, Helen Rappaport, Cathy Rogers, Lisa Gee and Josa Young. I think three of those haven't done the book swap (why?? must be rectified) and I can vouch for each and every one of the others as a delightful person to have dinner with. And in fact I've had a sandwich with Lisa Gee too so really there are only two dark horses. Tickets are £45 for four courses plus champagne, and the proceeds all go to the Rainbow Trust charity for sick children.
UPDATE: Having looked at my list of commitments I panicked and passed on speech-making duties to PATRICK WOODROW who is lovely, and a bit of a dish - you will not be missing out.

24th October: another Book Swap, this one for kids. 2pm at the Windsor Firestation. The legendary author of the Mr Gum books, Andy Stanton, will be joining Scott on stage (I will be in the audience - we decided the hosts shouldn't outnumber the guests) and all usual book swap rules apply - except that this one is FREE. It will sell out, though - did I mention that Andy Stanton is the genius who wrote the MR GUM books - so please do book here.

1st November: I'll be telling a story about me at the Let Me Tell You About Me night at the Book Club, 100 Leonard St, London, 7.30pm. The Book Club is some sort of fashionable Shoreditch bar, I believe. I don't know what story I'll be telling yet, but it will be about me. It will almost certainly be about me. Probably. Other guests include Molly Parkin and presumably anyone else they can find with initials MP.

And while we're here, there will be a Portsmouth Book Swap on Friday November 12th, a Windsor Book Swap on Thursday November 18th, and a Kilburn Tall Tales featuring a story from me (if I write it) and definitely more War Horses of Letters on Thursday November 25th. But I'll remind you of all of those nearer the time.

And my editors still think they're getting a manuscript out of me in January! Ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha. It's sweet, really.